An Absurdist Plague Fantasy - Chatting it Up with Johnson Riggs

The first fantastical satire of COVID ever is... a dystopian comedy novel?

Jul 03, 2025

Who is Johnson Riggs? For the uninitiated, he’s a philosopher-king in exile disguised as a novelist. If you’re been around these parts, you’ve probably heard about his dystopian fantasy book Pandemonia. It’s a fantastical satire of COVID and it’s utterly insane. With physical copies set to explode on July 4th, I took the time to sit down with Johnson and figure out what in the hell was going on for The Cultural Futurist.

How, exactly, could a novel about the COVID regime be a comedy?

Rachel Haywire:

You’ve written a book where knights fart, kings wrestle, and demons possess the bureaucracy. Let’s begin at the edge of the map. What exactly is Pandemonia? A satire? A kingdom? A diagnosis?

Johnson Riggs:

Pandemonia is at its heart, a self-indulgent exorcism. But way less self-indulgent than Stephen King, and the writing is twice as good.

Setting-wise, I mashed up Venice and DC to create Quagmerica, an empire sinking into the mire. I also take the reader on a cartoon tour of vistas inspired by the Middle East, Colombia and Amber Waves of Grain. As for the characters, I had a bit of fun. Let’s just say that:

This novel is entirely a work of fiction. The names, characters and incidents portrayed in it are the work of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or localities is entirely coincidental.

To my knowledge, this book is the only fantastical satire of COVID to date. Comedy equals tragedy plus time. It’s been just enough time since 2020. I’ve gotta strike while the iron is hot.

A video trailer about this whole psychotic thing:

RH:

Knight Captain Pickle isn’t exactly the archetypal hero. Why did you choose such a ridiculous idiot to lead your tale?

JR:

Pickle is a rockhead, but he’s not an idiot. I’ll grant that with a nickname like Pickle, it’s easy to underestimate him. But pickles are well-preserved, probiotic, and phallic. Furthermore, the pickle is a great metaphor for patriarchal values and low, monastic time-preference (winter is coming). He’s competent in all the wrong ways and therefore presents a sphinx-like character growth curve.

So why this protagonist? Well, modern conspiracy theories lack any protagonist – therefore, they deny human agency. Therefore, insert hero. This is an anti-propaganda, pro-conspiracy heroic legend.

RH:

You’ve created a world that’s both grotesquely funny and eerily prophetic. Did you set out to write “high fantasy for a collapsing empire” or did the empire simply catch up to you?

JR:

Well, the real world is grotesquely funny, and prophets are eerie. I’m not sure I predicted anything, I just read some old books and intuited an alternate universe. The wheel of time turns, or something. I did get high off my own fantasy, but I think readers will enjoy a whiff of my genuinely musty brand. The muse caught me off guard and she wrote half of this thing, then the old whore tricked me into doing the rest of the work. I guess we’re splitting the proceeds and custody of Sir Pickle.

RH:

Let’s talk metaphysics. Is Pandemonia a dreamscape or is it more like the real world in drag?

JR:

Metaphysics? They’re feeble. I exist in liminal spaces, so I’m confident that fiction is more real than the news. The book is a dreamscape in that all the female characters are either hookers or wives. This book is straight as hell, but its world is lurid.

There’s actually a DMT trip written into the book, which again, calls these feeble metaphysics into question.

RH:

What books, films, or fever dreams shaped Pandemonia? What’s in your stew?

JR:

My sources of inspiration include Army of Darkness, Final Fantasy 4-7, and 80s-90s spoof movies.

Again, without being a fart sniffer, I couldn’t have done this without Dante, Gilgamesh, and South Park.

RH:

There’s a strange sincerity to your book underneath the nihilist humor. Do you believe in redemption?

JR:

I’m laughing, and making humor, but I am also serious. Deadly serious.

This may sound corny, but I tried to be cynical and it didn’t work. I’m also not a utilitarian, so I had to get busy. Turns out Aristotle was right. About all of it.

If you’re a nihilist or atheist or something, you’re just being an edgy child. Now grow up, redeem yourself, and read my farty little book.

RH:

You’ve been called everything from a postmodern Tolkien to a bathhouse Lovecraft. How would you describe your literary lineage?

JR:

Who the Hell said that? I will fight them! Anyway, the first serious work of literature I read was Encyclopedia Brown. Then I read the Narnia books, Redwall, Dragonlance, Wheel of Time, and the Dark Tower series. I started the Song of Fire and Ice books, but quit when George R. R. Martin started writing about the Iron Bank and the Rothchilds replaced him with a fatter clone.

In college, the punchline of my philosophy major was Wittgenstein, who, during my senior year, mocked me for studying philosophy. It was annoying to get to the end of my course of studies and be told that it was a waste of time, that God was dead, and that the cannibals were coming to get me.

I’ve been doing penance for my illiteracy of late. Part of what sparked this journey is CS Lewis’ Space Trilogy, especially That Hideous Strength, which struck me as proto-Q-Anon. HP Lovecraft is superb and I regret not reading him earlier.

RH:

What’s next for Pandemonia? Is this a one-off exorcism or the first in a series of mythic transmissions?

JR:

MGM has optioned this for a $20M, so I’m set. I don’t even care that they recast my able-bodied, taciturn protagonist as a sassy black trans cripple.

Anyway, Mission accomplished: I wrote a book! But the real money is in merchandising. We’ll see how that goes before I write anything else.

RH:

If you had to deliver one prophecy for the future of culture, right this second, what would it be?

JR:

The Amish had it all figured out 2 centuries ago. The rest of us are cooked. Sorry if you missed the buggy.

RH:

Thanks for taking the time to do this interview. With your recent appearance on the Team Futurism podcast you’ve become a household name. It’s been great getting to know you before you inevitably become more famous than I am. Just don’t forget me on the way up.